Recently, a couple of people have mentioned that I seem pretty content in my current life situation. (I am, among other things, single.) I think that contentment is something that all people struggle with, and I’m not sure why it seems more often to be considered a single person’s struggle. Either way, I’ve been thinking about contentment and ways, by God’s grace, to pursue contentment. The following idiosyncratic list is not at all comprehensive, but I hope it suggests some good places to start thinking about contentment. I’ve provided a few Scripture references, too—again, not comprehensive, but some good places to start thinking.
I’m going to divide this up into concepts and applications. The concepts can be applied in any situation, but my applications will relate specifically to my life and to contentment as a single student (since that’s what I know!). I hope the specifics may be helpful, though, as you think about contentment in your own circumstances.
Concept 1: Vocation
Vocation, in the original sense of “calling,” is one of the sweetest and most contentment-generating concepts that I know. The idea that God has specifically called me not only to live as a believer, but also to live in a specific place, and do specific things, is so comforting. It means that wherever I am, I can live to honor God and fulfill His purpose for me. Even if things aren’t going the way I would choose, I know that God is in control, and as long as I am seeking Him, He will order my life according to His plans (Psalm 37:4-5, Prov. 16:9, Col. 3:18-24).
Application 1:
Some aspects of God’s calling for me may change, while some do not. God has called me to be, among other things, a Christian and (for now) a student. As a Christian, He calls me to hear His word, pray, meet with other believers, and participate in a local church body. As a student, He calls me to do my homework, participate to the best of my ability in classes, and pursue my work with diligence.
He also calls me to use my time at school to serve others, demonstrating love and humility to fellow Christians and to those at school as a reflection of what Christ did for me (Phil. 2). In His graciousness, He has given me a real love both for the church and for academics, so that He has not only equipped me for these vocations, but actually has given me a true enjoyment of them. However, even at times when I don’t feel that love or enjoyment, I am comforted to know that God has put me here and will use my obedience and diligence to produce lasting results for His kingdom (Eph. 4:1, 2 Tim. 1:8-14, Eph. 5:15-16, Phil. 1:6).
Concept 2: Fallenness and Depravity
“What?” you say, “I thought this was a list of good things!”
Stay with me: The Bible teaches that all have sinned, and that the world and all people are subject to the curse that followed Adam’s sin. (God also calls all people to turn from their sins, trust Christ, and find redemption and salvation in Him by faith, Rom. 1-6.)
Knowing what I do about fallenness and depravity DOES help me to be content, because I understand that when my life situation is not what I would desire…guess what…no one else’s is either!!! Until Christ returns, pain, sadness, longing and suffering are not just part of my own experience. They are part of everyone’s experience.
Application 2:
Thanks in large part to my mom’s ministry teaching and counseling women in our churches, I grew up with an understanding that…to be frank once again…people have lots of problems. Women have lots of problems. Married women who wear cute clothes and have nice houses and adorable children have problems. Sometimes, they have life-alteringly difficult problems. It took a number of years of thinking this through, but I have, I believe, truly accepted the fact that wearing cute clothes, getting married, living in a nice house, or having adorable children will NOT alleviate my problems. In fact, these tend to cause their own problems.
Jesus said that each day has enough trouble of its own (Matt. 6:34). If, by His grace, I can deal with the problems inherent to a single student who has a roommate and an apartment, then I am thankful. If, at some point, He chooses to let me deal with another set of problems, I will work to handle those in a way that pleases Him.
Concept 3: Blessings
The Bible teaches that God gives us many good things to enjoy (Matt. 7:11, Jas. 1:17). Because life changes so quickly, the things I am able to enjoy now are not necessarily going to be available for me to enjoy throughout life. So…I seek to make the most of my time by really trying to see the best in my situation and to love being in this stage of life (Ecc. 2:24, 3:13, 5:18, 1 Tim. 6:17).
Application 3:
Just a few of the blessings that I truly enjoy as a single student are:
- A flexible schedule: This means that I can meet people for fun or for ministry at varied hours, often shifting my study schedule in order to make time for other things.
- Food: Within reason, I can pretty much eat what I want, when I want. Pancakes at midnight? Cereal for three meals in a row? I work to be healthy, but I love the flexibility to eat in or eat out, cook or have leftovers, as it fits my life.
- Travel: I can pick up and leave for a weekend with very few problems. This allows me to have relaxing car time, to visit friends, and to see new parts of God’s world.
- Convenience: I can arrange my room (and much of my house—being thoughtful about my roommate of course) in ways that make sense for me but might not if I had a family. I keep notebooks in my pantry for easy access, have stacks of library books on the floor, and keep craft projects out in my room. It’s a little thing, but it’s nice.
- Sound sleep: It is rare that anything wakes me up in the middle of the night. Right now I do not have children who need me or a husband who snores. I am totally appreciating this while it lasts!!!
- Being in a learning environment: People at a university are generally open to ideas. I love learning new things on a daily—hourly—basis. I also love the opportunities that this allows for me to share with others about my own faith in an open setting.
Concept 4: Specific provision of God
God provides for His people, and in each situation, I see how He has specifically given me everything I need in order to serve Him (Matt. 6:25-34, Phil. 4:18-20).
Application 4:
I think that, as a single person, I see this in particular when God fulfills for me the roles that I generally think of a husband as fulfilling: financial provision, protection, etc. It is a blessing to see God work out my life in a way that allows me a safe place to live, money to use, and others to care for me when I’m sick or need help. God cares and provides, and I am thankful (1 Pet. 5:6-7).
Concept 5: An eternal perspective
This life is just the beginning, and the trials here are temporary. I am working for the Kingdom. The work I do here matters and will have lasting results. I am part of something so much bigger than myself, and by God’s amazing plan and amazing grace, I will enjoy not only the fruit of my labor, but the whole of His Kingdom (Hebrews 10:36-12:3).
Application 5:
Whatever I do as a Christian, single student MATTERS. It really does. I need to write my papers, do my reading, meet with friends over coffee, cook my dinners, go to church, encourage my roommate, call my mom on the phone…all not just because they are part of my life, but because they are for the greater purpose of pursuing God—knowing Him and enjoying Him forever!
Ultimately, contentment is a blessing of God, but we are also responsible to do things that foster contentment. Then, as we seek Him, become more impressed with His glory, and learn to trust His wisdom, we will be increasingly able to say with Paul that we have learned to be content (Phil. 4).